My last words for 2009

Ladies and Gentlemen. Boys and Girls, and Children of all ages.
Where did that come from- a tv show in the 50's?
It's that time of the year again.

It's the end of another decade. Holiday advertising and sales are over, early Winter, short days, dark at 4:30pm. The New Year starts tomorrow night/Friday morning. That means its' time to review our goals for 2009, and make our new goals, for 2010.
Are New Year's resolutions goals?
Our country is not in its best shape. In fact, some are saying that the "naughts" was the worst decade of our country's existence.

Unemployment is at record high's; and we all have our problems.

That's right, each and every one of us has our own set of problems. There is no one without problems.

Johnny Carson said that having money eliminated money problems, but left him with all of the other problems. Of course, for most of us, our number one problem has to do with money, or the lack thereof. But it doesn't make life any better or any worse then those who don't have money problems. And if you think otherwise, if you think that just having money makes everything honkey dorey then you are mistaken.
(honkey dorey? what does that mean?)
Many of us look around and think that everyone else has it better than we do. Many people live their lives in envy, haunted by the green eyes of jealousy. Many people live their lives thinking that everyone else got a better hand from the deck, gets better chances at life, and has more luck then they do. And many of us might look at a certain someone else, who might seem to have a lot of money, good job or business, lots of friends, and think, "I bet they don't have any problems", or "I wish I had his or their problems". Unless you walk in my shoes, you cannot know what I see, and feel. (There is a great expression that I just messed up terribly). How about- the grass is always greener on the other side.

At various times in my life many people were envious of me. I seemed to have it all.

While writing this story, I was reminded of the old Simon and Garfunkel song, Richard Cory. (Now I can't stop singing it to myself).

They say that Richard Cory owns one half of this whole town,
With political connections to spread his wealth around.
Born into society, a banker's only child,
He had everything a man could want: power, grace, and style.

But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I'm living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.

The papers print his picture almost everywhere he goes:
Richard Cory at the opera, Richard Cory at a show.
And the rumor of his parties and the orgies on his yacht!
Oh, he surely must be happy with everything he's got.

But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I'm living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.

He freely gave to charity, he had the common touch,
And they were grateful for his patronage and thanked him very much,
So my mind was filled with wonder when the evening headlines read:
"Richard Cory went home last night and put a bullet through his head."
Oh to be Tiger Woods? I wish my life was as good as Britney Spears'? Charley Sheen? Phil Spector has such a great life -- bet he doesn't have a care in the world! Princess Diana- she really had the world by the short hairs, all of the money in the world.

If we all took our problems and we put them into a hat, the chances are we would want our own problems back, and not anyone else's.

Really it's not about what our problems are, what we perceive our problems to be, but it is our own attitude towards them.

We might consider our problems to be monumental and insurmountable. Some people can't handle their problems. So but what are the options? Run away? Nervous Breakdown? Alcohol or drug? Therapy? Death? Suicide?

But my problems, they're mine, and I'll take them, I'll deal with them, because I have no choice. Life goes on, which is a lot better than the alternative. And besides that, I am happy.

Remember the children's book- The giving tree? The giving tree gave the boy his apples so the boy could sell them and have money, and the tree was happy. The giving tree let the boy cut down the branches so the boy could build a house, and the tree was happy. The giving tree let the boy cut down the trunk of the tree so the boy could build a boat, and the tree was happy, but not really. Then the boy came back, and there wasn't much tree left, just a stump, and the giving tree said to the boy, "I have nothing left to give you," but the boy said, "I am old, all I want is a place to sit and rest." And the tree was happy.

My father had a series of strokes, which took away his ability to walk and talk and communicate with the world; and ultimately he became a vegetable. After the strokes, my parents moved to Florida because Staten Island just wasn't handicap friendly. For my parents to go anywhere, I had a couple of guys who would have to go to carry my father in and out of wherever he wanted to be. Florida is handicap friendly. Everything is on one level, and accessible. I used to visit them quite frequently. I remember one time my mother introduced me to a man in a wheel chair, just like my father, also out to lunch like my dad was at the time, and my mother telling me that this man was the president of this huge bank. This was in the late 80's, when the buzz around was that the person with the most toys at the end, wins. Wall Street was out of control. Real Estate was out of control. The great crash at the end of the 80's hadn't happened yet.

I will never forget that after I met this man and his wife, with all of their money, power and prestige, I realized that the winner isn't the one having the most toys; it's about how you feel as you age.

I guess that is when I really set my first goal- which was then and still is today, to live a healthy long life, without medical problems interfering with my quality of life, by eating right and exercising regularly. Now I have plenty of medical issues. I go days with no hearing, I had toe surgery, and my toes still hurt (I am currently being treated by a pedicurist- not a podiatrist- Blue Cross won't pay Anna Nails, even though they should- manicures and pedicures are probably more beneficial to people than psychiatrists - although I am not getting pedicures for relaxation, I am getting them because I have toe problems - but I definitely see the relaxation benefits. I have terrible skin issues. I've had various types of skin cancer, from basil cell to melanoma, and everything in between (I'd write them down but I don't know how to spell them all). They are not my problems. They are my health issues. Which is how this email started I think, before I started my rambling.

My cup is half full, not half empty.

I have my "monumental problems" but I also have intricate plans to deal with them. And there is also plan B, if plan A doesn't work; and then there is plan C, and plan D. Don't get me wrong, we all have our moments. That's allowed. That's normal. It's okay.

(That's why God created oatmeal raisin cookies).

So the $64,000 question is- How can you reach your goals, if you don't set them?

Just this past week, I changed all of my underwear to the next size smaller. Man did that feel good. Now changing my underwear size was not one of my specific written down goals, and I still haven't reached my ultimate long term goal, but I am making progress, reaching some short term goals, which helps every other aspect of my life run smoother, and helps me maintain my positive attitude, and just feels so good. Last week I reached my short term 3 month goal, (from the weight loss challenge), to get back into a size 38 pants, which I did.

That being said, RIGHT THIS MINUTE is the perfect time to sit down, with a pen (or at a computer) and set your goals for 2010.

These are the instructions I included in last year's 'it's time to set goals' email.

1. Set CLEAR, SPECIFIC, MEASURABLE GOALS: (Health, Wealth, Family, Social, Public Service).
2. WRITE THEM DOWN.
3. SET a REALISTIC DEADLINE. (12-month goal; 3-month goal; weekly goal; and daily goals). There are no unrealistic goals, only unrealistic deadlines.
4. Identify OBSTACLES. Make removing the obstacle a priority and work on it every day.
5. Determine what INFORMATION, KNOWLEDGE, TECHNOLOGY, is NEEDED TO REACH YOUR GOALS. Come up with a plan to get it
6. Determine what PEOPLE, GROUPS, and ORGANIZATIONS are NEEDED to REACH THE GOAL.
7. MAKE A PLAN TO OBTAIN THE GOAL. Write down every conceivable detail that you can imagine.
8. DO SOMETHING ON THE PLAN EVERY DAY. Review it, read it out loud, write it and re-write it. Update it. EVERY DAY
9. VISUALIZE THE GOAL AS ALREADY ACHIEVED
10. FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION!!!!

Now I recently heard that a highly effective method to set goals is to draw a picture of what you have in mind. Instead of saying, I want to lose weight you visualize yourself as being thinner. Draw a picture of yourself as thin. Additionally, you need to write down in a positive manner, I am so happy and pleased, that here it is, (date in the future), and I am now.........

And when setting goals think big. Shoot for the Stars. Don't let anyone tell you to be realistic or talk you out of setting high goals. The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it. Michelangelo.

Tiger Woods visualizes his swing before he swings. He visualizes himself hitting the ball into the cup. He certainly doesn't visualize himself coming in third, or hitting into the Sand trap.

Setting Goals in a positive way, as an accomplished fact, is how we trick our subconscious mind into capitulation.

When we think to ourselves, I am starting tomorrow; the subconscious takes you at your word, and makes it so we don't start until tomorrow. Of course tomorrow never comes, it's always tomorrow. This is very important. Setting goals is a way of taking control of our own life, exercising control over our subconscious.

If it's to be, it's up to me.

Last year I shared my goals. I didn't reach all of my goals. I am still working on reaching my goals. But I did make a lot of progress towards them in many different directions and on several fronts. I also stopped along the way and adjusted my goals. Changed deadlines, and changed a lot of the short term goals.

But before I get into my specifics, I would like to say that I really had a great year, talking to all of you who might have dropped me a note, sent me an email telling me that you enjoy my writing, or gave me a call.

Thanks to everyone who called about a listing, or referred someone to me, or added people to the list.

Thank you to Eileen who told me that she was addicted to my emails, and Anthony who tells me that I am brilliant, and Eve who tells me that she loves my writing, and Richard who engages me intellectually, and my cousin, Larry, the rocket scientist from NASA who thought that I might be expressing an interest in science, and my crazy lawyer friend Robert who wishes he had my professional skills and acumen; and Bruno who tells me he reads my emails in the morning to find out what is going on in the industry; and my cousin, Stuart, who edits for me, and the people who commiserated with me about weight loss, and shared with me their hearing issues, and Ted who points out errors made by other brokers, and all the people who told me what a whippersnapper is, or how to find out myself, and thank you to all of the other people who sent me a note, which unfortunately got lost, when my laptop was stolen last month. Believe me, it is my pleasure.

Goals realized in 2009

I sold every listing that I got (both of them).

I get referrals every day (well not every day/maybe every week) from people who read my emails, and from the people they pass them along to.

I write the most successful email publication on Staten Island.

My goal for 2010

I am so happy and thankful, that here it is: January 1st, 2011, and I am at the peak of my health and fitness, fit and trim, weighing 130 pounds, wearing small and medium men's clothing. I write down everything that I eat, which is 5 or 6 meals a day, small, nutritious, healthy good food, good choices, drink a gallon of water too. I exercise 4 or 5 times per week, because I love to exercise, it makes me feel so good. I feel the fat and the stress just sweating out of my strong lean body. I wake up well-rested each morning, eat my breakfast, pack my lunch, go to the gym, go to work, I sell an average of one property per week, to nice people on my list, and their referrals, I send out emails to 5000 people on my list at a time. Life is very good, and I love my life.

.......................to be continued